Trigger Warning: This article discusses the topic of sexual assault and rape.
Here's another excerpt from my old Pagan advice column, originally appearing in Thorn Magazine. Reposted for Festival season. -Amy Blackthorn
Of Green and Glass: Where Down to Earth Solutions and a Glass Edge Meet. By Goewin GreenWitch
Dear Goewin,
The pagan festival season is fast approaching, and I’ve had a group of friends ask me to go with them. I’m able to take the time off of work, and I’ve saved what I need. I’m kind of worried, though: I heard from a friend that a dear friend of hers was raped at a festival last year. I want to go, but I’m worried about my safety. Is there a way I can be safe? Are my fears grounded in reality, or am I just being paranoid as my friends have suggested?
Signed, Safe Camper
Dear Safe,
According to a study reported by womenshealth.about.com, sexual assault is the most rapidly growing violent crime in the US, with fewer than 50% of rapes reported. Many victims are ashamed of what happens, and may believe they are at fault in some way. This is not the case. Rape is about power, not sex. Eighty percent of rapes are committed by someone who knows the victim, and 61% of female victims are under 18 years old. Although the majority involves male perpetrators and female victims, 5% of reported rapes happen to male victims.
Unfortunately, there have been recorded cases of sexual assault at festivals, and not just pagan ones. Mainstream festivals, campouts and concerts, as well as many other public events, have been known to attract predators. But don’t let this keep you home and afraid-- then they will have won.
Just because they walk around hearing “Harm None,” people think that nothing bad could ever happen in a pagan community event. Pagan campouts involve just as much common sense as every other camping event. I have a black belt, I've taken Tae Kwon Do, Judo and Aikido, but I don't go walking down dark alleys, with iPod headphones in my ears.
Any good friend would be worried about your safety no matter where you’re going, so use that to your advantage and remember the buddy system. I don’t care if you have to use the Spot-a-Pot at three AM, take a friend with you! Make a habit of walking with others and stick to paths with good lighting, in public view whenever possible.
Get to know the security at the event you're attending. You're paying to be here, know what you are paying for. Ask registration how to contact security in case of an emergency. What protocols are in place for someone's violation of laws?
Parties are often found at festivals. Observe the same rules you would at a bar. Don’t leave your drinks unattended. If you MUST, go get a new one. Don’t take the chance that something went into your drink while you weren’t around. Don’t drink to excess, you want to be in control of your faculties to be able to say “No” if you need to! If you are too drunk to walk back to your tent, then you are too drunk to fend off an attacker.
Many police agencies suggest carrying pepper spray with you, but since every state has their own restrictions, please check with local law enforcement. The states with the stricter restrictions include New York, Michigan, Hawaii and Wisconsin. Also, don’t just throw it in your purse, as it is unlikely that you will be able to find it in the bottom of a bag if you need it. If you have a belt, many spray canisters come with holsters. It’s a lot less recognizable in a holster than carried in hand. A few rules to remember when buying pepper spray: When you buy, but two. Take one outside away from people and pets. Spray it until it's empty. You need to know whether it is a stream or fog, how long it sprays, how far the spray will reach, and how long before it is empty. If you are going to use it on someone, empty that thing. It's cheap, you can buy another. You cannot buy another you. Always buy pepper spray with an expiration date. That tiny, pink, pen sized canister may be cute, but you need safety, not another accessory. If it doesn't have an expiration date, it's not worth your life. Re-purchase yearly. The propellant that forces the spray out of the can will dissipate over time. You want to know it'll be there if you need it. Some brands come with UV dye. This means that if your attacker escapes and washes their spray soaked face, and the police locate them a few days later, they may still have UV dye on their skin they didn't scrub off.
Make sure to avoid areas that seem deserted, and stay aware of your surroundings! It’s harder to sneak up on someone who knows where she is and where she’s going. An aware and confident stance makes you less desirable as a potential victim.
Just because this is a pagan gathering, don’t fall into the thinking that everyone there thinks the same way you do. Just because “Harm None” is your motto doesn’t mean that the creepy guy on the other side of the fire circle thinks so too. Don’t go off with strangers, don’t let them into your camps, and don’t go back to a stranger’s tent.
What to do if you are assaulted while at festival:
- Get to a safe place, away from your attacker! Many rapists will threaten to hurt you if you report them. They are trying to command power over you. After all, that is why they forced themselves on you to begin with: to command power. Take your power back by taking control of the situation.
- If you are raped, your first instinct might be to take a shower or bath to wash away what has happened to you. DO NOT bathe, change your clothes, or wash your hands or face! Valuable forensic evidence can and will be lost! If you’re able, you can bring a change of clothes for after your discussion with hospital personnel or doctors.
- Do not alter the scene, straighten anything, or remove items. If the scene is your tent, zip it up and get out as soon as possible. The police will want to examine the scene to determine if there is any additional evidence they can use to prosecute. Fingerprints, fibers and the like can be lost or destroyed, so it’s best to let the forensic team do their job.
- If you are there with friends, find one you trust to come with you to report. You are allowed to have someone support you at the hospital and with police. Witness statements have been proven to be the most reliable within the first twenty minutes of any traumatic event, so you need to get help. If your cell phone has a voice memo feature record your voice relating details of what happened as soon as possible so you don't lose any details with time.
- Every festival has someone in charge. Go to a registration area or find security-- usually, those in charge will have radios. If there isn’t a phone available, get someone you trust or someone in charge to get you a ride to the hospital as soon as possible. This is very important due to the number of diseases that are spread through sexual contact. In most states, the hospital will have to report the rape to the police. If no one is available to go to the hospital with you, or you feel shame or fear, victim's advocates are on call 24 hours a day 7 days a week in most states to go to the process with you.
- Some victims choose not to press charges because they “just want it to go away.” Immediate medical attention helps when deciding to report the crime, providing evidence needed to prosecute the rapist if a criminal case is pursued. If you've been raped and think you don't want to report it, you could change your mind later — this often happens — and having the results of a medical exam can help you do this. If evidence is collected, then you are protected no matter what you decide to do. At any time during the medical exam, you can say if you don't want a certain test performed or evidence collected. Your body is your own, the hospital just wants to help catch the person who assaulted you and make everyone safer.
- If you think you've been given a rape drug, a doctor or technician can test for this, too. Be aware that this toxicology test covers any and all illegal drugs. If you have used illegal drugs, this does not mean you are at fault for what happened to you, police and hospitals ask this so that they can better understand the timeline of events and possible interactions.
- Lastly, seek professional counseling. Make sure you allow yourself to talk to those around you. Your friends and family are there for you. If you feel you can’t talk to them and don’t have the ability to talk to a therapist, there are many free and anonymous help lines you call to talk to someone who knows what you are going through. Please, if you or someone you know has been the victim of sexual violence or rape, talk to someone. Don't deal with this by yourself.
Now, I hope you understand that I’m not telling you this to keep you away from festival; I want you, all of you, to be safe. Unfortunately, it seems our society believes that it is more socially acceptable to gossip about who is in what coven now than how to protect oneself in the real world. Discussing protection and pagans doesn’t have to be about which herbs to place around your tent: the real world belongs here, too!
National Sexual Assault Hotline | 1.800.656.HOPE
For more information please visit:
http://womenshealth.about.com/cs/azhealthtopics/a/rapehealsurvive.htm
http://www.rainn.org/ The Rape, Abuse and Incest National Network
http://rapecrisis.com/ The Rape crisis hotline 24hrs
http://rapecrisis.com/ The Rape crisis hotline 24hrs
About: Amy Blackthorn has been Greening her magical world for 22 years. When she isn’t writing, she can be found teaching classes on Tasseomancy, Floriography, Hoodoo, Magical Perfumery, Herbal Wisdom, Astrology, and a variety of other topics. She also enjoys reading (with her Tarot Cards, her gardening books or a good Paranormal Romance), cooking for her husband and friends, and walking her dogs.
Her new Tea Store Blackthorn Hoodoo Blends is now online.
